new year again. there it goes, the first decade of the 21st century. like a f___t in the wind. excuse me. i mean it's quite a waste.

went to JB the 2nd time to get some air, n some goods. though the quality of air is not as good as it is here, still able to inhale some fresher air.

but seems i cant stay in shopping centers for long. can feel the humming in the brain. no desire for most of the stuff either. no strength to walk around either. rare species of women?

never really ventured into the country. i'd like to explore further but ...(brainwashed by too many stories of accidents)... should i get a life insurance first? for my parents of course. Confucius has once said, when ur parents are still around, don't travel afar. (coz they worry too much, parents at all times). a rare few believe in such a thing in the 21st century, again i'm the rare few. (only told them after my visit)

travel further? for some enlightenment. having the feeling that when wandering about in a foreign land, one will eventually find the direction, the answer. will be out of confusion. then looking back, all the mess is actually nothing, all the pain too.

but only my mind wanders

谢霆锋 - 香水

holidayzzz

climbed all the way up, din't jump down

the dream catcher is dusty
still hanging over the table

are my dreams dusty too?

why am i missing
the mattress i just dumped
那么恋旧吗
filled w feelings suddenly

that's the piece of sponge
when coming back exhausted, always dropped flat on it like a corpse
it has witnessed me through tough times, tougher times, tougher and tougher times...
life hasn't got better, but have to replace it with another one

will i get insomnia on the new one later? how soon will i get used to it?
why do i feel myself a fool more n more

even a mattress can make me so emo
do u understand
a person....

that wasn't me
feeling is the root of unhappiness
i didn't have any
shouldn't have any

橱窗后
有一个
我还过不去的世界
不管别人怎么说
都坚守在窗外
死硬得让人摇头

如果你喜欢的是
窗外的我
只能失望而终
最长三年，最短明天
我就会过去那边
再怎么拖延
都有那一天

如果你喜欢的是
追随一种感觉
会跟着对方的变化
而变化
就请不要刻意
让一切顺其自然
自生自灭

也许
执迷不悟的自己
没资格说得洒脱
也执迷不悟地觉得
爱恨由心
未尝不是种洒脱

多年后
你不会再想起
那个不施颜色的躯壳
内中深藏
青年才有的愤

正如多年前
一切都可以
化作疾风漂远

run~~~

since my 1st paper in this school (which was a fail grade), every time i ran out of the hall with a blink of the eyes. ran all the way towards the bus stop till my heart couldn't take it anymore. actually i feel like yelling while running, but no that's too dramatic. 低调。。低调。。

i can run but i can't escape. still, it can make me feel a temporary escaping

i'd always like to escape. 10 yrs ago, 8 yrs ago, 4 yrs ago, 6 months ago. @ every junction in life, i have no power tilting the sail. coz it has been 'set' to the 'right' direction. whether right or not so right i wouldn't know. coz no other paths will be taken. sure of this.

whining again.. for nothing. maybe wanna remind myself, if i ever have children next time, i hope we won't be alumni of ANY school i attended.

in the jungle

never in my life i had so much instant noodle for breakfast, lunch & dinner.
isn't it supposed to be 'the best time in life'?
......

where'd u go?
i miss you so..